Outlandish!

Have you ever been in a situation where someone was wearing something so outlandish it caught you totally off guard? Then they catch you staring with shock and disbelief and you are forced to say something. Typically, you are so chicken shit in that moment that you end up saying something horribly ridiculous. I complimented crazy!

So something recent reminded me of this, but instead of outing the new culprit I'll take it back to the biggest situation! I had a co-worker once who was a fashion disaster! She was mismatched, too little, too short, too tight, out of style, too young, too old, and haphazard. Now there was this one day that she came to work with too tight pants with a tattered hem and a too little shirt with buttons that pulled across her chest. The clothes were wrinkled, of course. Then there were the jelly platform shoes! I was used to the outfits, but the shoes?! I stared at her shoes like a deer caught in headlights. I was looking back and forth between her shoes and her face hoping that soon she would yell, "Gotcha!" She didn't. She looked back, and I froze. I stuttered out hello, and before I knew it I said, "cute shoes." I said it kind of dry, but it must have been convincing because she smiled and thanked me. Huh?! I mean, I love jellies. I own a pair of designer jelly flats. I never wear them, but I think it's fun that I have them. I would never wear them to work though. I would never wear them any further than my closet. I'm too old for that trend, and she's my age.

It happened again, and it will probably keep happening forever. I will probably keep being chicken shit and laughing hysterically later. DAMMIT! Actually, I'm just gonna pray that the right people read my words and follow some of them. I don't know everything, and I'm sure I live even less than that. But, what I know, I know, I know!